A Spoonful of Poison Read online

Page 19


  “No, I’m just up. Come in and tell me about it.”

  “It’s about Mr. Selby,” said Mrs. Bloxby.

  “Gorgeous George. What about him?”

  “He’s dead!”

  “How?”

  “A local at that place in Cornwall where they were on honeymoon was walking his dog along the cliffs when he heard cries and shone his torch. He saw a man hanging onto the cliff edge for dear life while a woman was stamping on his fingers. He said the man had the woman by the ankle. He ran forward, but they both plunged into the sea. The coastguard are out looking for the bodies. The witness said it looked as if the man had already been over the cliff and was trying to get back up. What do you think of that?”

  Agatha sat down at the kitchen table and lit a cigarette. “It looks as if Fred got wised up to him some way. It really looks now as if George might have wound up poor Sybilla to kill his wife. Maybe Fred knew about it and tried to get him first. I never liked that girl, but now I’m heartily sorry for her, and I hope somewhere up in heaven the first Mrs. Selby is having a good laugh.”

  “That’s sacrilegious, Mrs. Raisin.”

  “That’s human, Mrs. Bloxby.”

  Epilogue

  A GATHA RAISIN SAT HUNCHED up in a first-class railway carriage as the London-to-Mircester train ploughed on through the fog. Why couldn’t this be the night when the trains were cancelled? she thought. I don’t want to go.

  She was heading for James’s engagement party after a rigorous makeover in London. Her hair extensions fell to her shoulders in soft waves. Her face was cleverly made up by an expensive beautician. She had been dieting ferociously and the highly expensive midnight-blue silk dress she had spent a fortune on was extremely flattering.

  The train, which was often late, perversely drew into the Gothic splendour of Mircester Station exactly two minutes early.

  Agatha longed to forget about the whole thing and go home, go to bed and cuddle up to her cats. But everyone would feel sorry for her and she couldn’t bear that. Toni had said their new premises would be opening with a party in a week’s time. Agatha didn’t want to go to that either.

  Agatha took a cab to the George, changing on the short journey out of a pair of flat shoes into a pair of high-heeled sandals.

  “Here we go,” she muttered. “Rehearsal’s over. Onstage at last.”

  A couple leaving the George gave her a nervous look.

  She glanced at the noticeboard in the foyer. “Engagement Party-Betjeman Suite.”

  The Betjeman Suite was so called because the famous poet and lover of Victoriana would have adored it. From its faux medieval ceiling to the enormous marble fireplace at one end, it had not been changed since the hotel was built in 1875.

  Agatha left her red cashmere cloak in the cloakroom outside the suite, took a deep breath and made her entrance. She was surrounded by familiar faces and cries of “Agatha, you look fabulous!”

  Nervously her eyes scanned the room. Charles came to join her. “Where’s James?” asked Agatha.

  “He’ll be here shortly. They got held up by the fog. Have a drink.” Charles grabbed a glass of champagne from a passing waitress and handed it to her.

  Agatha looked round. Toni was wearing a skimpy black dress with thin shoulder straps. Her fair hair was piled up on her head and shone under the lights from the huge crystal chandelier above her. I’ve lost a good detective, thought Agatha bitterly. I’ve always prided myself on being a good businesswoman and not letting personal feelings get in the way. What went wrong? And so ran Agatha’s troubled thoughts, unaware that her whole life had been propelled by emotion.

  A cheer went up and Agatha slowly turned round. James stood beaming in the doorway, Felicity Bross-Tilkington on his arm.

  Agatha felt any confidence she had left seeping out through the soles of her shoes. Felicity was exquisite. She had wide-spaced grey eyes in a tanned face. Her thick brown hair cascaded down on her shoulders in an artful arrangement of waves and curls. Straight hair, as Agatha knew, had just been damned as passe. Her figure was slim and showed no signs of rigorous dieting. She was wearing a low-cut gold evening top which showed off the smooth perfection of her genuine tan and the stunning necklace of old gold and rubies around her neck.

  James looked as proud as Punch as he gazed down at his fiancee. He never once looked at me like that, thought Agatha, but let’s face it, I never once looked like that. James led Felicity straight up to Agatha and introduced her. “I am so pleased to meet you,” said Felicity. “Goodness, after all James told me about you, I expected to meet someone quite ferocious.”

  “Here, have another glass of champagne,” said Charles at Agatha’s side. James introduced him to Felicity. “Come and talk to me, Felicity,” said Charles. “I think we know some of the same people.”

  James smiled at Agatha. “You look great. Long hair suits you. So what do you think of Felicity?”

  “She is certainly very beautiful,” said Agatha. “Where did you meet?”

  “In Paris, at my friend Sylvan’s party. Is he here?” He looked around the room. “He’s probably held up by the fog. So I have your blessing?” asked James, studying Agatha intently.

  “Yes, James.”

  “You don’t think I’m too old for her? She’s only thirty-two.”

  “Doesn’t matter for a man. Has she been married before?”

  “No.”

  That’s odd, thought Agatha. How does anyone that beautiful get to thirty-two without being married?

  Others began to cluster round. Agatha saw Mrs. Bloxby and went over to her. “How do you feel, Mrs. Raisin?” asked Mrs. Bloxby.

  Agatha looked at her friend in dawning relief. “Do you know, I feel just fine. I really do. Now that I’m here and I’ve met her, it’s all rather pleasant. James seems like a different person to me now. For the first time in my life, I’m over men.”

  They were joined by Bill Wong and the staff of the agency and they all began to talk shop.

  Mrs. Bloxby joined her husband, who was standing moodily in a corner of the room.

  “Can we go now?” he asked.

  “Now, really, Alf. We can hardly go now. The party’s just begun.”

  Agatha was aware of James standing beside her and turned round. “Do you really wish me well?” he asked.

  “Of course. Were you hoping I would be jealous?”

  “Something like that.”

  “But you are in love?”

  “Oh, yes. She listens to everything I say and takes an interest in my work, particularly military history. Instead of the travel books, I might suggest doing a series of guides to famous battlefields.”

  “I always listened to you,” said Agatha defiantly.

  “I remember one occasion talking to you about the Crimean War and your eyes glazed over.”

  “I listened to every word!”

  “When was it?”

  “Can’t remember. I never was good at dates. Was that the one with the longbows?”

  “That was Agincourt. See? You haven’t a clue.”

  “James, darling. You’re neglecting your other guests.” Felicity took his arm.

  “So I am. Talk to you later, Agatha.”

  “Wait a bit. When are you getting married?”

  “Next April,” said James. “Coming to see me off, Agatha?”

  “I wouldn’t miss it. Where is it to be held?”

  “In Downboys in Sussex at the local church.”

  “I’ll be there.”

  Agatha watched them uneasily as they moved about the room. Why did he hope I would be jealous? wondered Agatha. If I were really in love with someone, for example, it wouldn’t even cross my mind to make James jealous.

  Roy Silver arrived. He was wearing a dark blue silk shirt and dark blue trousers.

  “You look as if you’re ready for bed,” commented Agatha.

  “It shows what you know. This is the latest thing. You’ve become very provincial, Aggie. Though I must sa
y, you’ve never looked better. Hair extensions?”

  “Yes.”

  “I hope you didn’t get them done cheap. A friend of mine went to a Mr. Bert and he said bits started to fall off in no time at all.”

  Agatha, who had gone to Mr. Bert, decided to change the subject.

  “That’s the fiancee over there.”

  “She’s very beautiful. Except for the mouth.”

  “What’s up with her mouth?”

  “Too thin and something reptilian about it. Now who is that who’s just arrived?”

  Agatha looked across to the doorway. Sylvan had arrived. He could not possibly be anything other than French. He had a beaky nose, a thatch of fair hair streaked with grey, hooded eyes, a mobile mouth and expressive long thin fingers. As James rushed to meet him, Agatha noticed that all Sylvan’s expressive gestures were Gallic. He had a tall slim figure with broad shoulders and tiny hips.

  A little glow started in Agatha’s stomach. A minute before she saw Sylvan, she was aware of her feet beginning to hurt. Now she did not notice the discomfort. Everyone else at the party seemed to fade. In her dazzled mind, Sylvan seemed to be illuminated by a spotlight.

  James led Sylvan forward. “Agatha, may I introduce Sylvan Dubois? Sylvan, Agatha Raisin.”

  “Aha. Your first wife.” Sylvan took Agatha’s hand. “How on earth did he let you get away?”

  Agatha smiled. “James is about to have a very beautiful young second wife.”

  “Pah! Me, I find the mature woman infinitely attractive.”

  His grey eyes were flirtatious as he looked down at her.

  “Do you live in Paris?”

  “Yes, I do.”

  “And what do you do for a living?”

  “Nothing much. My father had a factory for manufacturing bottles. He left it to me when he died. I have an excellent manager, so I have quite a lot of free time.”

  His English was excellent but spoken with an attractive French accent. “So what do you do with your free time?”

  “Let me see. I get up in the morning, have breakfast, wash and dress and go out to meet friends at the local brasserie. We put the world to rights. Then I have a late lunch and go back to my apartment, where I read and then get changed again and go to the theatre or a cinema.”

  “And what about Mrs. Dubois?”

  “Alas, there isn’t one.”

  “Was there one?”

  “A long time ago.”

  “And what happened?”

  He looked amused. “So many questions. But you are a detective, so I suppose it comes naturally to you. Now I have-how do you say-a predicament. A bit of your hair has just floated into my glass of champagne. Do I mention it?”

  “You just have,” said Agatha, turning fiery red.

  He eased it out with one long finger and dropped it on the floor. “You should have got your extensions done in Paris. Don’t look so upset. The effect is still dazzling. Do you think James will want to marry you again?”

  That distracted Agatha from worrying about her hair. “Why?” she asked in amazement.

  “My friend James is an intelligent man and little Felicity is oh, so boring. At the moment, he can only see her appearance. He needs someone like you.”

  Agatha wanted to say, “And I need someone like you,” but said instead, “Are you here for long?”

  “I am driving back to Paris tonight. I only came for this. I shall see you at the wedding.”

  James and Felicity joined them. “Come and meet some of the others, Sylvan,” said Felicity, hooking her arm in his and leading him away.

  “Do be careful, Agatha,” whispered James.

  “What about?”

  “Sylvan has the reputation of being a ladykiller.”

  “Then he can kill me anytime,” said Agatha.

  “Now you’re being silly.”

  “Don’t call me silly. You always used to run me down.”

  “No, I did not. You love playing the victim, Agatha.”

  “I am not a victim,” howled Agatha.

  There was a sudden silence in the room. Then everyone started chattering loudly again.

  Agatha stomped off to join the comforting presence of her friend, Mrs. Bloxby. “Where’s your husband?” asked Agatha.

  “He had a headache and left,” said Mrs. Bloxby. “What upset James?”

  “He was warning me against Sylvan.”

  “But he need not worry. You’re over bothering about men, aren’t you?” asked Mrs. Bloxby anxiously.

  “Oh, sure,” said Agatha.

  Agatha looked across the room and her eyes fastened on Sylvan talking to a radiant Toni. Her eyes narrowed. “Excuse me,” she said.

  Mrs. Bloxby watched as her friend deftly cut out Toni and led Sylvan away, watched as she laughed and talked and tossed her hair, unaware of the fact that bits of her extensions were floating off. She gave a sigh.

  “What’s the matter?” asked Bill Wong.

  “It’s Mrs. Raisin,” said Mrs. Bloxby. “She’s off again!”

  Sylvan announced after half an hour that he had to leave. “I’ll see you at the wedding, Agatha,” he said.

  “Perhaps I’ll be in Paris before then,” said Agatha hopefully. But Sylvan merely smiled and leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek. As soon as he had gone, Agatha realized her feet were killing her and her head was itching.

  “You know,” said Roy, appearing behind her, “a lot of your hair has fallen out.”

  Agatha took out a compact and peered in the mirror. “I’ll sue that bastard,” she raged.

  “How did you get on with that attractive Frenchman?”

  “All right,” said Agatha, feeling like a fool. What must he have thought of her as she stood there, monopolizing him and losing hair right, left, and centre? Would she only be a joke to tell his friends about?

  “Can you put me up for the night?” asked Roy.

  “Yes, I’m taking a cab home. I’ve left my car in the square, but I don’t want to drive after all this champagne. Could we leave now?”

  “I think you should circulate for a bit. You haven’t spoken to any of your staff.”

  Agatha decided she had better do her social duty. She talked to Mrs. Freedman, Patrick and Phil. She moved on to Toni and Harry and asked them how they were getting on with the new agency and listened with only half an ear.

  At last she decided enough was enough, collected Roy and said goodnight to James and Felicity.

  At the cloakroom she collected her cloak and her bag with the flat shoes in it and slipped them on, groaning with relief.

  Charles joined them. “I’m coming with you.”

  “If you’re coming home for the night, it’s the sofa for you,” said Agatha.

  Back in her cottage, Agatha said she was too tired to sit up discussing the party and took herself off upstairs.

  As she changed out of her clothes into a nightdress and wiped off her make-up, she worried and worried that she had bored Sylvan. Had she talked too much? He had asked her about her work and she remembered she had gone on about it for a long time. But at least she would see him again. The tentacles of obsession were coiling once more around Agatha’s brain.

  At one point in the night, she woke up with an odd feeling of dread. She thought of Felicity and James and was overcome by a wave of fear. Something was wrong. Something was badly wrong. Then she shrugged the feeling away.

  It was those shrimp canapes and champagne, thought Agatha, and then fell asleep again, dreaming of Sylvan.

  M C Beaton

  ***

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Death of a Snob hm-6 Read onlineHamish Macbeth 06; Death of a Snob hm-6The Dreadful Debutante Read onlineThe Dreadful DebutanteAgatha Raisin and the Fairies of Fryfam Read onlineAgatha Raisin and the Fairies of FryfamHamish Macbeth 22 (2006) - Death of a Dreamer Read onlineHamish Macbeth 22 (2006) - Death of a DreamerDishing the Dirt Read onlineDishing the DirtMinerva Read onlineMinervaDeath of a Nag hm-11 Read onlineDeath of a Nag hm-11Hamish Macbeth 18 (2002) - Death of a Celebrity Read onlineHamish Macbeth 18 (2002) - Death of a CelebrityQuadrille (The Love and Temptation Series Book 5) Read onlineQuadrille (The Love and Temptation Series Book 5)Death of a Glutton hm-8 Read onlineDeath of a Glutton hm-8The Westerby Sisters (Changing Fortunes Series) Read onlineThe Westerby Sisters (Changing Fortunes Series)The Scandalous Marriage (The Dukes and Desires Series Book 7) Read onlineThe Scandalous Marriage (The Dukes and Desires Series Book 7)The Adventuress: HFTS5 Read onlineThe Adventuress: HFTS5Death of a Valentine Read onlineDeath of a ValentineDeath of a Nag Read onlineDeath of a NagDeath of a Dustman hm-17 Read onlineDeath of a Dustman hm-17Hamish Macbeth 09 (1993) - Death of a Travelling Man Read onlineHamish Macbeth 09 (1993) - Death of a Travelling ManThe Loves of Lord Granton (The Changing Fortunes Series, Vol. 2) Read onlineThe Loves of Lord Granton (The Changing Fortunes Series, Vol. 2)Agatha Raisin and a Spoonful of Poison ar-19 Read onlineAgatha Raisin and a Spoonful of Poison ar-19To Dream of Love Read onlineTo Dream of LoveAgatha Raisin 04 (1995) - The Walkers of Dembley Read onlineAgatha Raisin 04 (1995) - The Walkers of DembleyHamish MacBeth 01 (1985) - Death of a Gossip Read onlineHamish MacBeth 01 (1985) - Death of a GossipDeath of a Maid hm-23 Read onlineDeath of a Maid hm-23Belinda Goes to Bath Read onlineBelinda Goes to BathDeath of a Kingfisher Read onlineDeath of a KingfisherDeath of a Charming Man hm-10 Read onlineDeath of a Charming Man hm-10Death of a Prankster hm-7 Read onlineDeath of a Prankster hm-7The Miser of Mayfair: HFTS1 Read onlineThe Miser of Mayfair: HFTS1Hamish Macbeth 05; Death of a Hussy hm-5 Read onlineHamish Macbeth 05; Death of a Hussy hm-5A Governess of Distinction (Endearing Young Charms Book 6) Read onlineA Governess of Distinction (Endearing Young Charms Book 6)The Westerby Inheritance Read onlineThe Westerby InheritanceDeath of a Hussy Read onlineDeath of a HussyHamish MacBeth 07 (1998) - Death of a Prankster Read onlineHamish MacBeth 07 (1998) - Death of a PranksterHamish Macbeth 20 (2004) - Death of a Poison Pen Read onlineHamish Macbeth 20 (2004) - Death of a Poison PenMiss Tonks Turns to Crime Read onlineMiss Tonks Turns to CrimeEdwardian Murder Mystery 01; Snobbery with Violence emm-1 Read onlineEdwardian Murder Mystery 01; Snobbery with Violence emm-1Agatha Raisin and the Wizard of Evesham Read onlineAgatha Raisin and the Wizard of EveshamHamish Macbeth 12 (1996) - Death of a Macho Man Read onlineHamish Macbeth 12 (1996) - Death of a Macho ManYvonne Goes to York Read onlineYvonne Goes to YorkA Highland Christmas Read onlineA Highland ChristmasSweet Masquerade (The Love and Temptation Series Book 4) Read onlineSweet Masquerade (The Love and Temptation Series Book 4)Agatha Raisin and the Witch of Wykhadden Read onlineAgatha Raisin and the Witch of WykhaddenThe Dead Ringer Read onlineThe Dead RingerAgatha Raisin 05 (1996) - The Murderous Marriage Read onlineAgatha Raisin 05 (1996) - The Murderous MarriageAgatha Raisin 07 (1998) - The Wellspring of Death Read onlineAgatha Raisin 07 (1998) - The Wellspring of DeathAgatha Raisin: As the Pig Turns ar-22 Read onlineAgatha Raisin: As the Pig Turns ar-22